Do you remember when you were a kid and growing older was a big thing? You wanted to be old enough to have a bike. You wanted to be old enough to go on a date. You wanted to be old enough to leave home. We all did.
Then we grew older and all those things happened. We grew up. We got a job. We got married and had kids. After a while it was like you had been thrown like a ball and now you were rolling along, just rolling through your life.
Life is good, but never wholly what we expect. Life is a continuing series of puzzles to solve, mountains to climb over, surprising adventures and quiet happy times. There is not a lot about life that’s boring, unless you allow it to be.
So, now, by anyone’s definition, I’m old. I have all the standard indicators. My bones creak, my knee complains, and I can’t walk everywhere like I used to. Is life over?
No. When you were very young, didn’t you think life would be over at xx age, “xx age” being your current definition of how old was old? I know I did. I thought when I was old, I would sit on a rocker on the porch and live in my head, and speak only when someone remembered I was there and still alive. (But then I didn’t know about blogging.) Or, looking at our parents, I thought I would probably sit in my recliner and watch TV.
Have you watched TV lately? Of course you have, but as I grow older I find I don’t want to waste my time watching something I don’t care about. I do sit out on the porch reading and drinking something cold. But not in the way I thought it would be. If you’re not old yet, I’m telling you now, life is different when you’re old, but not in the way you thought it would be.
We’ve been retired for 8 and 7 years. If you’re young enough, you probably think “and you aren’t dead yet?”. We are so busy we can’t believe it. My spouse has his big garden and his mission to fill the neighborhood with fresh fruits and vegetables. I am writing a book and learning to watercolor. This is the time of our life when we can do what we want - if our aging bodies will let us. And they do. Sometimes it’s a bit harder, but it’s always worth doing.
For me, sitting around watching TV for hours, or not interacting with life, is a kind of death. For me, each day is a day in my life and I’m going to live it the best way I can. So, we square dance. My spouse is the delight of all the single ladies because I can’t dance more than one or two squares. I tease the ladies and tell them they can dance with him, but they can’t take him home. I really don’t have to say that. They know it’s true, but they love to dance and he does too.
I’m involved at church, and Sisters In Crime. Sisters In Crime is an organization that supports women who write about crime. It includes a large number of men. It was formed to gnaw away at the inequity between women and men who write about crime. So, I belong, but to tell the truth, I enjoy the company of other writers more than I have a fire burning inside of me to fight. I would if I had to, but I pick my battles carefully these days.
So, I didn’t want to pick a fight today, or as my mother said “get on your high horse.” I just wanted to say that you should live every day of your life the best way you can. You don’t know how many hours are allotted to you (thank heavens) so enjoy what you have. Each and every one of them.
Marilynne
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